Seguimos conselhos de vários amigos, que já passaram pelo mesmo e em quem confiamos, por adorarem os filhos e serem óptimos pais. Um dos livros que descreve de forma sucinta o problema e a solução diz o seguinte:
"The controlled crying technique
If the wakefulness has settled into a regular pattern and is taking a severe toll on the family, you can try this technique. Versions of this technique are widely used by many sleep-trainers and family coaches and I have always found it highly effective. In many cases, the technique will do the trick in less than a week.
At the outset, it is importante to state that 'controlled crying ' is not the same as 'leaving a child to cry'. That old-fashioned remedy is not acceptable today; quite rightly, as it is both brutal and ineffective. 'Controlled crying' is completely different. Unlike leaving a child to cry for long periods unattended, which reinforces a sense of abandonment, 'controlled crying' demonstrates that you are still at hand, that you have not gone away, but that you are in charge and it's time to sleep.
I know that some parents don't want to leave their child crying for any length of time. While I wouldn't recommend the technique for every family, I do think that's one of the best ways of breaking a cycle of wakefulness.
The key to the technique is learning to distinguish between different types of cry. A high pitched continuous cry or a low, groaning sound is the sign of a child in severe distress or pain. If your child is crying like that, it's time to act promptly and see what's the matter.
Crying for comfort or attention sounds different. It may begin with a grizzle or a wail, but it tends to break off at intervals while the child waits for results, and then it returns. It's like a wake pattern. It's your job to observe and listen to your child's crying. Until you feel totally confident that you can recognize the different types of cry, don't start the technique.
This is how I use the technique:
- The first time your child wakes, spend a few moments listening to the tone of the cry. Listen and observe. It's hard for any parent to have to listen to their child to cry and not respond, but try to stay calm and don't allow yourself to be swamped by feelings of panic. If the crying does not indicate distress, wait a moment;
- When there has been a sustained amount of crying, go to the child. Don't turn on the light. Don't make eye contact - look at the bridge of your child's nose or at his tummy. Don't talk or make conversation. Make a soothing noise - 'sh' or 'hush' - rub him on the back or the tummy, replace the covers and leave.
- Accept the fact that your child will wake and cry again - it's a pattern you're dealing with. It might be an hour later, it might be five minutes later. When she cries again, wait for double the time before going into her and repeat the same procedure.
- On subsequent wakings, carry on doubling the intervals between going in to soothe him. This is the point when most parents find the going gets tough. Let me tell you the emotions you're going to be feeling. Responding to your child's cry is a natural instinct. When you're trying to resist that urge, tou'll have a rush of adrenalin, your hands will get hot and clammy, your heart will pound and you'll feel like you're losing control. Understand that this is just your body's natural reaction and try to stay calm. Get support from your partner or ask a friend to stay with you overnight - someone who can give you comfort and strength when you're feeling like this.
- Don't give up and don't let it slide. The message will get across, perhaps sooner than you think. You should begin to see substantial improvements within a week.
Espero que ajude aqueles que precisam de dormir tanto como nos ajudou a nos!!